The Chips Were Down

I'm not so sure my chemo nurse is real and i'm pretty certain he's an angel.  He's seen me for both my treatments so far and has had the measure of me both times. The first he saw straight through my bravado and distracted me with stories,  the second he gently reassured me when i couldn't pretend I was anxious .

 Today when I visited to have my line flushed, he seemed to sense I wasn't feeling upbeat and out of nowhere he appeared and gave me a big hug while I had a big cry. My back's been hurting and I now know it's down to the white cell booster injections i'm having each day and you know you really are comfortable with someone when you can blurt between sobs 'and this is so unladylike and i'm so sorry but i'm.....constipated! '

Yes. I did just mention poo and yes I did consider a working title for this post as 'Not Giving Any Shits', but I wasn't sure how that would go down. The fact is, we all do it, although some more frequently than others. It's a really common side effect of the anti-sickness medication and can make you feel like... you guessed it. The irony. 

Aside from that i've been blessed with a day of rest - as my lovely friends have popped in to do the washing up and swept in to take both girls to school and nursery, collect them and feed them  Meanwhile I gave in to the cravings at lunchtime, put the healthy foods aside and had a great big bag of chips because quite frankly,  there's only so much being good that's good for you.   

Pam returned after the girls bedtime as the pain in my back reached its worst yet and it sent me spiralling into disaster mode. This in turn led to a relaxing bath where I stupidly forgot myself and plunged my arm with the line in straight in the bath. Looks like I might be taking another visit to hospital in the morning to have it redressed again.

 Oh poo.